SLEEEEEP

January 27, 2015

leopard with green eyes

‘Sleep…Your eyelids grow heavy…You want to sleep…sleep…sleep.’

0

THE MAN WHO WASN’T THERE

January 26, 2015

Jerome Bessemer was not by any stretch of the imagination a major participant in his own life. Chosen to be valedictorian of his high school class, he gave a terrific speech at graduation. It’s a pity he wasn’t there to hear it. At college he was a rogue bacteriology student, but never found the time to leave his room or, for that matter, to acknowledge the fact that he was in a room. There were rhymes. There were reasons. He was unaware of them. Somehow he got a job under the floor of a museum. That said, he never reported to work or to anywhere else. When he died, he didn’t die. He wasn’t even watching. He played cards instead in a stairwell, the cards being blank and often imaginary.

0

STRANGLE THE COBWEB

January 25, 2015
Tags:

strangle the cobweb, my lady

don’t live on borrowed time

although your past, it is shady

the couplets, they must rhyme

strangle the cobweb, my lady

in a warm and sunny clime

while still you’re in your prime

strangle

embrace the grime

0

COLD ENOUGH

January 24, 2015

2015-01-23 13.46.13

It’s cold enough for snow.

The elevation of 6240 feet is high enough for snow.

So where’s the snow?

0

THE LOCH NESS KWIZ ANSWER

January 23, 2015

It might surprise you to learn that the Loch Ness Monster is a mutated butterfly.

0

THE LOCH NESS MONSTER KWIZ

January 22, 2015
Tags:

loch ness monster

The Loch Ness Monster:

a. can be lured ashore if you play your cards right.

b. eats only the finest eels shipped directly from the Sargasso Sea.

c. cannot dream in technicolor.

d. is really a mutated butterfly.

0

WHAT IS MISSING?

January 21, 2015

2015-01-20 10.47.43

6240 feet above sea level on January 21 in the town of South Lake Tahoe

Where’s the snow?

0

ANTICIPATION

January 20, 2015

2015-01-14 10.54.41

In a few months this elderly fellow will be displaying some mighty lovely clusters of pink blossoms. Stay tuned.

0

THE MEDAL AND THE LION

January 19, 2015

medal

lion

…………………………medal

lion…………………………

medallion

0

HOW TO BE DIMLY AWARE

January 18, 2015

Ezekiel Kroft leads not a life of quiet desperation, but one of dim awareness. For instance, when dining out, he concentrates intently on the mashing of the butter into the baked potato. When the waiter approaches from Kroft’s left and asks if everything is satisfactory, Kroft jerks his head to the right and mumbles, ‘Bancroft’. He then resumes butter mashing. Furthermore, when Kroft slides two dollars through the window at the race track and says ‘Number 4′, his response to the hurried ‘Win, place, or show?’ is ‘Why not?’ or a vague smile. And lastly, how many times has Kroft left the dentist’s office, the pharmacy, the opera house, the car wash, the Tower of London, oh so many places, pursued by someone shouting ‘You forgot your shoes!’? Frightfully often.

0