THE PINK ROSE SISTERS

January 22, 2018

NOW APPEARING FOR ONE WEEK ONLY

THE PINK ROSE SISTERS!

Daisy and Tulip sing!

They dance!

They keep you laughing with

SNAPPY PATTER!

“The Pink Rose Sisters are amazing!” – Teddy Roosevelt

“The Pink Roses are magic!” – Harry Houdini

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THE FOLDING CHAIR AWARD CATEGORIES

January 21, 2018

Most Fingers Pinched

Best Collapse

Longest Resistance to Folding

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HUDDLING

January 20, 2018

Leaves huddle in terror as The Great Blower approaches

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THE DAME JUDITH ANDERSON KWIZ ANSWER

January 19, 2018

It is a little known fact that Dame Judith was a symphony caliber trombonist.

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THE DAME JUDITH ANDERSON KWIZ

January 18, 2018

To play Medea, Dame Judith got into the desired mood by:

a. listening over and over again to a recording of Abbot and Costello’s ‘Who’s On First’ routine.

b. reciting, ‘The sheet is slit. Who slit the sheet? Whoever slit the sheet is a good sheet slitter.’

c. playing ‘Stars and Stripes Forever’ on her trombone.

d. sleeping on a bed of nails with Johnny Weissmuller.

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A SENTENCE BY JAMES PLUNKETT

January 17, 2018

He had a dirty beard and his remaining teeth stood up like cartridges in his hungry face.

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BERRIES

January 16, 2018

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THE DANCE OF DINING AND DENIAL

January 15, 2018

i did not do what i did

oh, margie, carry the table in

i did not say what i said

oh, rosie, dust off the plate

i am not what i am

melvin fat, melvin thin

haul that platter of big macs in

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BANAL INTERVIEWS WITH CELEBRITY GHOSTS – LORNA DOONE

January 14, 2018

Loon: It’s not often that the Lords of the 4th Dimension honor us with the ghost of a fictional character. So today I am proud to welcome to the 3 Question Interview Lorna Doone, who I am assured is a fictional character. Madame Doone, what do you look for in a cookie?

Lorna Doone’s ghost: I undertake the majority of kitchen tasks myself.

Loon: What do you look for in general?

Lorna Doone’s ghost: I prefer my lovers to be at least 20 stones in weight and a full head higher than any other fellow in the general populace. Generals I care for not in the least.

Loon: In your century was it considered polite to punch a man in the face?

Lorna Doone’s ghost: Of course not, you dankish, boil-brained clack-dish. (storms off in high dudgeon)

(Loon smiles weakly.)

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POEM FOR AN IGNORANT MAN

January 13, 2018

sad

sad

sad

sad

sad

sad

sad

bigly

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