Anvil in a Lace Bootie

Rhonda and Dave, as always, greet the new year while sitting on the giant’s head. Tweet

The loon resolves to: 1. spend a few days of each month tied to a chimney. 2. bake and consume in one sitting a porpoise. 3. host an event having something to do with otters. 4. fill a bucket with spit. 5. hallucinate only on weekends. 6. deposit all of his money in a snow [...]

Sometimes Mother Nature’s just a show off. Tweet

the tight eyes of the braided rope haunt – the spiral cord, engorged, continues to dine, methodically chomping – the pain of spillage is bloody but neatly defined – i remember the tractor fondly when i tap my sleeping foot against the gleaming radiator – monstrous my owl – harpsichord lost in the dunes Tweet

Although the loon at present is experiencing snowy winter, last week when he visited the loon princeling, he saw fall fallen after a blustery rainstorm. Tweet

It had been a busy holiday, exhausting really, but nevertheless, the tame giraffe polished with vigor while humming a tune his chloroform kit. Oh, hadn’t it made for a most splendidly marvelous day. What a pleasure it had been for the tame giraffe to make use of his taxidermy skills on such a number and [...]

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear, But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer. Tweet

“In tonight’s performance of ‘The Redemption of Mr. Claus’, the role of Santa’s AA sponsor will be danced by Timmy Spencer, and the role of Santa’s parole officer will be mimed by Elizabeth Tilley.” Tweet

this one and this one Tweet

The loon has to pass through this haunted glade whenever he visits the loon princeling. In the past he has been obliged to fight off wolfmen, wolfwomen, assorted witches, a variety of hellhounds, an angry sasquatch, a shapeless hulk with very bad breath, an invisible laugher, some door-to-door salesmen ghosts, and, scariest of all, a [...]