February 23, 2011

8 ducks

one package gelatin

Pluck ducks, setting aside feathers for later burial in the foundation of any proposed new nearby highrise apartment buildings. Puree ducks into a paste. Mix in gelatin. Beat with a small oar until your arm trembles. Pour resulting mixture into 20 small parakeet molds and refrigerate. Down a fifth of vodka and a rasher of ham. Unmold puddings onto the kitchen floor, sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to your Irish wolfhound, Bosco, and stand aside while she devours the puddings. Move to France.

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