May 17, 2011

When choosing a fort, three things must be kept in mind:

1. location – You wouldn’t want your fort to be in the middle of a street, for example, nor would you want it built horizontally out of the face of a cliff. Beneath a crag is good.

2. size – A fort the size of a thimble or a walnut would be of absolutely no use to you, I think I can say without fear of contradiction. Although a fort the size of a vehicle, say a 1949 Nash Rambler, would be adequate for shelter, there really wouldn’t be enough room for your minions, and it goes without saying that minions require space. I’d recommend choosing a fort that could host comfortably a Roman legion of bakers.

3. walls – Crenelated or smooth? High or low? Fat or thin? As to height, the walls should be high enough to remove all possibility of your enemies simply stepping over them. They should also be of a thickness and strength not susceptible to breaking when lightly tapped. As for crenelated or smooth, it’s simply a matter of taste. Those who select crenelated have taste. Those that don’t are vile.

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