ZORRO THE DUCK, PRIVATE EYE

January 15, 2012
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Unable to fly after an all night binge featuring too many shots of rye and not enough parakeets, Zorro the Duck staggered through Golden Gate Park with a head full of hammers that wouldn’t quit playing at blacksmiths. He hoped to make it to his office in one piece and fall onto his couch for a week or two, where he would be tendered mercy by his spinster get-out-the-vote secretary, Susan B. Anthony. Yesterday’s Cliff House visit had turned up nothing but a sarcastic gull and a couple of goon seals who found it amusing to play ‘dunk the duck’. Zorro was no closer to finding the missing pelican, and his client was the kind of bird who expressed disappointment in a manner not to be viewed by children unless accompanied by an adult. Another day in San Francisco, another stumble down the trash lane of life.

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