BRAIN FUNCTION 742

February 18, 2013
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BANAL INTERVIEWS WITH CELEBRITY GHOSTS – ISADORA DUNCAN

February 17, 2013

Loon: At least the Lords of the 4th Dimension gave me a little hint this week by whooshpering ‘dancer’ in my ear. So the first of my 3 questions to … Could you stop flitting about for a moment, Ms. Duncan? Isadora Duncan’s ghost: Wind … birds … waves … Loon: There. That’s … Could […]

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A SENTENCE BY HILDA CHESTER

February 16, 2013

‘Eacha heart out, ya bum.’ Ms. Chester was the most famous Brooklyn Dodger fan of all.

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THE BILL HART VALENTINE KWIZ ANSWER

February 15, 2013

True to his word, Bill never again wore that hat. He gave it to his barber, who donned it thereafter every day to act as the focal point of his haircutting garb, thereby drawing attention away from his shabby shoes.

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THE BILL HART VALENTINE KWIZ

February 14, 2013

To prove the deep and abiding love he held for his sweetheart on Valentine’s Day, Bill: a. wore that hat she gave to him. b. wore that hat and took his lady fair snake hunting in the Mojave Desert. c. wore that hat while preparing a romantic repast of okra and grits. d. promised her […]

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PREEMPTIVE VALENTINIAN STRIKE

February 13, 2013
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This particular triffid lures you close before releasing its brain quiver rays, which induce unhealthy eating habits in its victims. Said strategy has proved to be quite effective, as you no doubt have noticed.

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STRAWBERRY AND VANILLA

February 12, 2013

This item is available in two flavors only: Vanilla and Strawberry

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PIED PIPER MESSAGE

February 11, 2013
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Hey, town council, when a guy gets rid of your rats, you really ought not to back out of handing over the payment agreed on in the negotiations. Capiche?

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BANAL INTERVIEWS WITH CELEBRITY GHOSTS – JOHN TYLER

February 10, 2013
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Loon: Welcome to the 3 Question Interview. Imagine my surprise when I found out this guy was president of the United States some time or other. Looks pretty olden days-ish by his clothes. First question – Mr. President, did you ever eat tapioca? President Tyler’s ghost: Tapioca? Loon: Yes. It creeps me out, you know. […]

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A SENTENCE BY ANTHONY BURGESS

February 9, 2013

We wore our hair not too long and we had flip horrorshow boots for kicking. As far as writers of things such as like A CLOCKWORK ORANGE, I likes the blokes what walk along the edges, O my brothers (and sisters).

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