FINAL SENTENCE

May 17, 2015

2015-05-15 10.53.04

And the clocks stopped at seven minutes before the hour across the world when all humanity suddenly vaporized, leaving the wounded, but grateful, planet in the nurturing fronds of the conquering triffids.

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A BLOSSOM BURST

May 16, 2015

2015-05-15 10.44.35

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OLD TIME RADIO CIGARETTE COMMERCIAL

May 15, 2015

Announcer: White Swan Cigarettes present (music in, music out) Trace Element, Private Eye.

Trio: (sing) White Swan Cigarettes are all the rage, They’ll help you live to a ripe old age.

Announcer: Yes, friends, remember White Swan Cigarettes, industry tested, are packed with health inducing chemicals. When you draw those finest of tars into your lungs, you can rest assured that all your troubles and cares will disappear. White Swan, White Swan Cigarettes. And now, we join Trace Element, Private Eye, in Act One of tonight’s mystery, The Case of the Laughing Dog.

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BRAVE TULIPS

May 14, 2015

2015-05-07 09.34.02

These tulips gladly risk frostbite as they hurry to the Cinema to catch the first showing of An Orchid in Winter starring Iris Rose.

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AMBUSH

May 13, 2015

2015-05-12 11.45.41

A great spot to picnic or hide while waiting to ambush a sasquatch.

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FREE LEFTOVER NOVEL TITLES

May 12, 2015

Broken Cantaloups

Darkness At First Light

Falling Through Candy

 

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GIFTS

May 11, 2015

They gave him some popcorn

They gave him a rake

They gave him 3 pieces of pie

They gave him a warning to be out of town by the 31st day of July

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PERKINS AND THE MILD MANNERED BLOWFISH

May 10, 2015
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The last thing Perkins expected to see was a mild mannered blowfish sitting across the table from her in the Automat. For this reason she froze in place with the hash loaded fork midway on its journey to her mouth.

‘Don’t be alarmed, young lady. The day couldn’t be lovelier. The weather couldn’t be nicer. I thought I’d join you for no other reason than serendipity. In short, you look pleasant to me,’ said the blowfish.

‘Thank you?’ Perkins managed to say, lowering her fork.

‘I know, I know, I know. Surprising, what? To see a blowfish not unfamiliar with the art of conversation here all large as life in the Automat. My name is Puffer, by the way,’ said the blowfish, nodding.

‘I’m Gale?’ said Perkins, uncertain about the status of her sanity. ‘You’re not in water. How …’

‘Well, Gale, pleased to meet you, and let me say it like this. Water is pretty much overrated as a living environment. I can take it or leave it. I mostly leave it, as you can see. I’m in the insurance game. Why? I worry about people like yourself, young women on the go, rush, rush, who knows …’

The attendants, clad in white, entered the Automat and efficiently straitjacketed and removed Perkins to the waiting ambulance.

‘What was that all about, I wonder? Poor girl was just sitting there alone not bothering anybody,’ said one Automat diner to another.

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A TRIFFID IN DISGUISE

May 9, 2015

2015-05-05 15.15.25

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A RUDOLPH VALENTINO KWIZ ANSWER

May 8, 2015

Rudy really wanted that last veal cutlet.

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