THE MARTIAN CORNICKLES

March 25, 2019

At long last the creatures of Mars, the cornickles, made themselves known. Telepathic messages from the red planet arrived simultaneously in the minds of all human beings on the planet Earth. Unfortunately, the messages were delivered to Lapps in Japanese, to Finns in Xhosa, to Italians in Tibetan, etc. Therefore, only one Finnish anthropologist was thrown into panic, and she, sadly, chose to do away with herself rather than face the Martian cornickles. The cornickles expressed deep disappointment at the lack of response to their messages. Feeling as if they were left with no other option, the cornickles reluctantly aimed their Bradbury ray at Earth and put it to use. So a simple failure to communicate transformed the blue planet  into an orbiting toasted marshmallow. I mean, like, you know.

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