Anvil in a Lace Bootie

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

DOLLY SISTERS #dada When agreeing to appear in the Ziegfeld Follies, the Dolly Sisters insisted that the contract include: a dress up as ants clause. a hovering clause. a bear clause. a sanity clause. one page exclusively devoted to hundreds of dollar signs. pic.twitter.com/NVV44bsSxo

11:44 am · August 6, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

something just inside the door to your left. You open the door. There she is. You die.

11:51 am · August 5, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

‘baggage car’. You nod and pass through the door. You are now between cars. PUH TICK PUH TACK PUH TICK PUH TACK There is a small window high on the baggage car door. You sidle up to it, gun in hand, and risk a peep inside. A young man, wild of eye, is nodding and staring at

11:51 am · August 5, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

don your fedora and strap on your gun. puh tick puh tack puh tick puh tack You listen without listening to the constant prattling of the conductor as he leads you through car after car. When he finally stops prattling and leading, he merely points to the next door and mouths

11:51 am · August 5, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

in the baggage car with one or two hostages, we’re not certain of the number. He has these demands, you see. It’s frankly beyond us. Would you take over?’ You sigh and arise. ‘Very well. Lead on, my good fellow,’ you say. Before following the conductor out into the corridor, you

11:51 am · August 5, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

train thoughts. ‘Yes,’ you say. The door opens. The conductor, hat in hands, says, ‘Pardon, sir. A bit of a problem. We were wondering if you, well, being who you are, could possibly help us with a young man, a passenger. You see, he’s gone a bit off and has barricaded himself

11:51 am · August 5, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

THE TRAIN #flashfiction The train rushes along the track, puh tick puh tack puh tick puh tack. You, tranquil, serene, almost mesmerized, gaze at the scrubby sage brush flashing by outside. A discreet rap on the door of your compartment interrupts your train of thoughtless pic.twitter.com/8h43uFI6Qz

11:51 am · August 5, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

All boxes of hammers are smarter than POTUS45. #POTUS45

4:10 pm · August 4, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

MYSTERY TITLES #dada The Lampshade Murders The Case of the Missing Elk The Sign of Four Minus Three The Handyman, Fiend of Sacramento

11:46 am · August 4, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

A triffid peeks from behind lime-hued leaves. #scifi pic.twitter.com/uTY0oDUTZv

11:42 am · August 4, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

A POEM #dada this is a poem not about owls it’s also not about goats it’s mostly about the way cheese is made with a small offhand mention of boats oh milk oh rennin (boat)

11:47 am · August 3, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

3 of 5 stars to Ahab's Return by Jeffrey Ford goodreads.com/review/show/34…

5:39 pm · August 2, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

@MoviesSilently Mine is Jessie Ralph as Ma Burley in San Francisco. She only had 2 scenes, but boy, did she nail them.

12:17 pm · August 2, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

DUEL #poetry trembling joe was a formidable foe he wiggled when i wagged i feinted here he feinted there my spirit sadly sagged in a final thrust i placed my all he danced aside adroitly i fell undone he pulled a gun and winged me by the oak tree

12:01 pm · August 2, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

SALE #dada HURRY! FINAL FEW DAYS! OUR 20TH SEMI-ANNUAL GOING OUT OF BUSINESS SALE! PRICES SLASHED, NAY, DISEMBOWELED! (not valid where the wild fern grows)

11:55 am · August 1, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

YELLOW BIKE! #dada #poetry cruel yellow bike! yellow bike! dawn yellow bike! yellow bike! snow yellow bike! yellow bike! pic.twitter.com/AL4KqjIUxp

11:44 am · July 31, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

mumbled Edgar. A constable familiar with Edgar appeared on the scene. ‘Edgar, what are you doing? Your giraffe was pardoned long ago,’ said the constable. ‘Was she?’ said Edgar, a smile further damaging his ruined face. The constable, taking offense, clubbed Edgar senseless.

11:59 am · July 30, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

‘Say, pal, watch where you’re going,’ said a night watchman narrowly avoiding a collision with Edgar. ‘Pardon my giraffe,’ said Edgar, and he staggered on. Eight weeks passed. A man stepped over Edgar’s legs, extended as they were out onto the sidewalk. ‘Pardon my giraffe,’

11:59 am · July 30, 2020

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

2020 #flashfiction ‘Pardon my giraffe,’ said Edgar. ‘Why did that funny man say “Pardon my giraffe?” said Alice. ‘Never mind, darling. Hurry along now,’ said Alice’s mother. Edgar continued wandering the street, bumping into walls, windows, and the occasional parking meter.

11:59 am · July 30, 2020