September, 2014 | Anvil in a Lace Bootie - Part 2

THE ERIC CAMPBELL KWIZ ANSWER

September 19, 2014

Eric’s nap boulder was also used as a picnic table.

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dada, Kwizzes by Doc

THE ERIC CAMPBELL KWIZ

September 18, 2014

Tags: dada

Eric Campbell, between takes on a Chaplin movie set, would: a. dance on his toes and pirouette. b. eat a wheelbarrow full of potato salad. c. bask and nap on his own special giant boulder. d. make haggis.

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dada, Kwizzes by Doc

THE LIFELESS CHIPMUNK

September 17, 2014

The lifeless chipmunk sat there, lifeless. A jaunty jay hopped by, paused, said, ‘What’s your story, captain? Usually you’re zooming around here like so much lightning.’ The chipmunk barely sighed, muttered, ‘What’s the use?’ ‘I know what you need,’ said the jay. ‘HAWK!’ The chipmunk flashed across the clearing and dove down a tunnel. The […]

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dada, Doc's Loon Fables by Doc

AN EPIC NOVEL OF THE AGED

September 16, 2014

WINDED, BUT NOT GONE

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dada by Doc

3 SETUPS

September 14, 2014

1. ‘Show Mr. Peabody into the library, please,’ repeated the insane woman clad in rags time and time again. 2. He suffers, I fear, from a severe case of permanent adolescence. 3. She was so full of herself that she overflowed onto others.

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dada by Doc

SEPTEMBER MORN

September 13, 2014

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Artwork by Doc

THE GANDHI DANCE STUDIO KWIZ ANSWER

September 12, 2014

The skill and passion combined in Gandhi’s tango were unsurpassed.

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dada, Kwizzes by Doc

THE GANDHI DANCE STUDIO KWIZ

September 11, 2014

When Gandhi opened his dance studio in Tempe, Arizona, : a. people were taken aback. b. the waiting list to join was lengthy. c. although the usual dances were taught, Gandhi specialized in the tango. d. some thought he’d gone dhoti and needed a rest.

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dada, Kwizzes by Doc

AN AGONY OF ECSTACY

September 10, 2014

a pleasure gone too far i.e. consumption of an entire pie at one sitting.

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dada by Doc

CHORUS GIRLS

September 9, 2014

Tags: dada

On a grubby roof in Los Angeles circa 1930, 9 chorus girl roommates take turns pounding each other impishly to wind down from a long sweaty day at the studio spent fending off various wise guy lotharios.

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dada by Doc

By this guy (grown old):

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Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

out into the palm of your right hand. Smear it across your forehead. Dance around, waving your arms. Don’t be shy. You are now invisible. To fly, simply double the recipe.

10:43 am · August 3, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

2 pinches of dirt. In the poke of dirt plant the 3 seeds. Pour the contents of the bowl over the poke and seeds. Go off into a corner and wait. When the hand of time has strangled a week or more, pluck the strange orange leaf which by now is waving from the poke. Chew it. Spit it

10:43 am · August 3, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

to step on them later with your bare feet. Your feet are bare, aren’t they? Good. That is important. You may now dispose of the steel flagon in any manner you choose, for its role in the recipe has been completed. You now add to the blue bowl with its clarinet bits and water the

10:43 am · August 3, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

1 poke of dirt Start by placing the clarinet on the ground. Jump up and down on it until you are tired. Then bash it to pieces with the steel flagon and place the largest bits in the blue bowl. Sweep the smaller bits away, as you will have no need for them, and you wouldn’t want

10:43 am · August 3, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

MAGIC POTION #FairyTaleTuesday To make this versatile potion, good for invisibility or flight, you need the following: 1 clarinet 1 steel flagon 3 seeds of any kind (doubt works well) a blue bowl filled 1/2 with water from a roaring cataract and 1/2 with empty 2 pinches and

10:43 am · August 3, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

clean the cauldron after all.’ The witch mother nodded once. ‘I thought you might.’

10:49 am · August 2, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

legs. One touch and you freeze, only to slowly melt until nothing is left but your still seeing eyes, which the Bad Skoon then gobbles up with a terrible gnashing of its daggery teeth.’ The witch’s daughter considered this new information. ‘Well, mother, I have decided to

10:49 am · August 2, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

thing. And if there is, what is it? And I don’t care because I’ve got my powers ready.’ The witch mother snorted impressively from her long bumpy green nose. ‘Your pitiful powers will be no match for the Bad Skoon. It has a great round lump of a body and 8 long poison fern leaf

10:49 am · August 2, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

THE BAD SKOON #fairytaletuesday ‘Behave or I’ll send you where the ferns grow, and you’ll be eaten by the Bad Skoon.’ The witch’s daughter narrowed her eyes and presented to her mother a skeptical expression on her as of yet still smooth green face. ‘Oh, there’s no such pic.twitter.com/TZ1uNsL9BU

10:49 am · August 2, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

4 of 5 stars to Undaunted Courage by Stephen E. Ambrose goodreads.com/review/show/41…

6:04 pm · August 1, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

BOULDER, BOLDER, BOWLED HER #limerick There once was a very fine boulder. No one in the meadow was bolder. He gathered flowers for several hours. His true love? Over he bowled her. pic.twitter.com/7D9oxVfFYW

10:50 am · August 1, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

3 SISTERS #nonsense Three sisters went to the moon. Their names were April, May, and June. They found no air or curtains there. ‘We won’t be returning soon,’ said April and May and especially June.

11:00 am · July 31, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

WHERE THEY WAIT #fairytales this is the wood where witches wait impatiently for wandering fools to decorate the walls of caves with spatter for captive ghouls pic.twitter.com/4pXC2z6IWi

10:53 am · July 30, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

PURPLE REIGN #floral pic.twitter.com/rHyn3GdhOU

10:44 am · July 29, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

SPECKS #floral pic.twitter.com/9kZTv734dQ

10:40 am · July 28, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

BEYOND #FairyTaleTuesday She disappeared into whiteness above the billowing waves Far from home she flew to dwell in the comforting echo of caves With blended thoughts, dark and light woven, she sat, content to wait Oh, what revenge she would deliver. Oh, what horrible fate! pic.twitter.com/5MlQ9LX9OQ

10:41 am · July 27, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

“Salmon and smoke. Will that be all?” “That’s what she said,” replied Harrison Mult, attorney-at-law, eyebrow shaving, blonde at bar waving. A citizen’s arrest was made by a strange armadillo in a green trench coat. No newspapers survived, and silliness was kept at a minimum.

10:49 am · July 26, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

chain, focus located. “I was born ready,” said Harrison Mult, attorney-at-law, foot floor tapping, knuckle table rapping. “What’ll it be then?” “How fresh is the salmon?” “I had to slap its face. It made a comment. Fresh enough.” “I’ll have that and a glass of smoke.”

10:49 am · July 26, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

HARRISON MULT #nonsense Harrison Mult, attorney-at-law, posing as if being considered for a seat on the Supreme Court, studied the menu. “Hello, my name is Legion. I’ll be your meal escort today. Are you ready to order, sir?” she said, pen at the ready, hair bunned, glasses on

10:49 am · July 26, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

5 of 5 stars to One Hundred Apocalypses and Other Apo... by Lucy Corin goodreads.com/review/show/41…

7:52 pm · July 24, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

lumberjack fired the pistol. The insurance adjuster took an early lead, but was overtaken and trampled to jelly by the elephant. The people waiting around with bread and peanut butter were beneath contempt.

10:50 am · July 24, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

eyes of rage at the broken sky. Insufferable insults had been exchanged days earlier at the box convention, and now the result, a 100 yard race of hate, was about to play out to its inevitable forensic conclusion. Ravens gathered in the dirigible overhead just as the renegade

10:50 am · July 24, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

THE ELEPHANT AND THE TAX CONSULTANT #nonsense The elephant and the tax consultant crouched low, preparing to hurl themselves down the track. The starter, a renegade lumberjack, raised her pistol. Neither elephant nor insurance adjuster spoke a word, but both peered through slit

10:50 am · July 24, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

observant,” said the barrier. “State your desire.” “Return to me my husband fully as merry as always he was,” said Gerda, the wife. No sooner said than done. The barrier disappeared. The good husband stood baffled, but merry. The pair returned home and lived merrily ever after.

10:51 am · July 23, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

searched the woods for days. At last, she gazed at the enchanted lavender barrier. More cautious than her good husband, she paused and thought. “If, strange and beautiful barrier, you are enchanted as I so believe, you will grant me one wish,” said the peddler’s wife. “You are

10:51 am · July 23, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

THE ENCHANTED BARRIER #fairytale When the old peddler encountered an enchanted barrier of lavender blooms deep in the forest, he proceeded cautiously, but not cautiously enough. No trace of him remained. The peddler’s wife, alarmed when her good husband failed to return home, pic.twitter.com/FjfMNvjAyF

10:51 am · July 23, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

Great Chambered Mountain of Ken. Ken was quite perturbed, and rightly so.

10:57 am · July 22, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

molten ravine and were consumed by the Thunder Bull Lizard of Gauze. The Lizard scuttled merrily across river and dale and roy and trigger, finding and consuming the Cube of Happy Flavors and the Tree of Pensive Contemplation before going to live forever in the

10:57 am · July 22, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

THE LIZARD OF GAUZE #nonsense Once a cruel carpenter and his savage beast set out to find and steal the Cube of Flavors from the Tree of Pensive Contemplation, which, according to legend, grew somewhere east of the Great Chambered Mountain of Ken. Unfortunately, they fell into a

10:57 am · July 22, 2021

Steve Shilstone

@steveshilstone

MARGARITA CANSINO #ritahayworth In response to Margarita’s question about the fairest of them all, the mirror says, ‘You’re good to go now, but wait ’til later.’ pic.twitter.com/pSYfUuSnEB

10:42 am · July 21, 2021

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