THE HERMAN MELVILLE KWIZ

February 28, 2019

Herman Melville: a. had a farm, e i e i o. b. had no farm, e i e i o. c. once gave Nat Hawthorne a hot foot.

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dada, Kwizzes by Doc

RECIPE – BEEF UNDER FIRE

February 27, 2019

50 beeves 8 cannons plenty of ammo Dig a trench 100 yards long. Herd beeves into same. Array all 8 cannons in a line 1/2 mile distant from trench. Load and discharge cannons. Repeat until ammo is consumed. Take your favorite spoon across no man’s land and dig in.

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dada by Doc

WHY, ENGLISH LANGUAGE, WHY?

February 26, 2019

“Sow wheat in the fields where my sow used to roam,” decreed the King after he wound the bandage around his arm wound. “Yes, sire,” said the lackey. “Bow when you address me, and hand me that bow,” snarled the King. “Yes, sire,” said the lackey, bowing. “Sire?” said the jester, bowing his viola da […]

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dada by Doc

THE COW POEM

February 25, 2019

consider the cow bovine lady ranch roaming dairy queen consider the cow pre-pasteurized cream creator hooved hamburger consider the cow for elected office raise the IQ of a lawmaking body

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dada, Loon Poetry by Doc

WORST ACTOR WINNER IN ACTION

February 24, 2019

Actor: Line? Prompter: To be or not. Actor: To be or not … Line? Prompter: To be. Actor: Huh? Prompter: To be or not to be. Actor: Oh, yeah. To be or not to be … To be or not to be … To be … or not to be … … Prompter: That. Actor: […]

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dada by Doc

GOLDEN OLDIE – MOMENTS PRIOR TO THE YOUNG LADY’S ERROR

February 23, 2019

The professor’s cat moved with lark-like civility down the hallway. Plel Lolman smiled with his wooden mouth. Widow Chirp, the landlady, ladled dollops of treason pie onto broken dishes. The professor remained in his room twirling a mackerel in anticipation of Crimson Bloodhound Day. Mavis, the parlor maid, sat in the boiler room eating a […]

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dada, Loon Stories by Doc

THE JULIE ANDREWS MY FAIR LADY KWIZ ANSWER

February 22, 2019

Mister Wrinkle, aka Rex Harrison, in turn affectionately called Julie ‘Little Miss Smoothbrow’.

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dada, Kwizzes by Doc

THE JULIE ANDREWS MY FAIR LADY KWIZ

February 21, 2019

During rehearsal for ‘My Fair Lady’, Julie Andrews: a. always showed up drunk. b. slept on a bed of nails. c. called Rex Harrison ‘Mister Wrinkle’. d. dallied in the black arts. e. had to be talked out of shaving her head for the role.

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dada, Kwizzes by Doc

BAWDY YET DAINTY LIMERICKS

February 20, 2019

There once was a crofter named Jones Who was constantly badgered by crones One day he asked why And was told, “My oh my, Be grateful we don’t grind your bones.” There once was a surly young peasant Whose life was quite frankly unpleasant Until he met up With the Duchess of Tup Who gave […]

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dada, Loon Poetry by Doc

FAVORITE LOON TOASTS

February 19, 2019

1. May you never be bitten by a rabid librarian. 2. May you never have to rely on a cobra for moral support. 3. May you never sign a contract to invent something in Antarctica. 4. May you never be required to send get well cookies to a bison. 5. May you always have harps […]

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dada by Doc
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