January 18, 2011
The furtive lamprey, Bill Scroggins by name, slipped silently into the darkest reaches of his favorite coral cave. His large suctorial mouth dimpled into a grin.
“They’ll never find me here,” said the self-satisfied lamprey.
“Why don’t you shut up and get out of my face?” said a nearby crab, Devon Holloway.
Bill Scroggins lashed his tail in a fury and quickly sought a more private refuge. Having found it, he sighed and once again dimpled his large suctorial mouth. All around him, but unaware, the reef continued to exist.
January 17, 2011
It creeps by night to perform foul deeds.
January 16, 2011
the loon’s screensaver after a nourishing breakfast
the loon’s screensaver after eating a tainted mushroom
January 15, 2011
As the body rolled to the ground Tarzan of the Apes placed his foot upon the neck of his lifelong enemy and raising his eyes to the full moon, threw back his fierce young head and voiced the wild and terrible cry of his people.
Whoa there, Edgar. Deep breath. That’s it. Now let it out slowly. I kid. Nice work, Ed.
January 14, 2011
“I think I’ll gnaw on the zebra haunch for a while. Care to join me?”
January 13, 2011
The fastest fly in the land loved to perch on any hand,
To show his speed at beating slaps, he sat on noses during naps,
He also loved to hang around a barbecue or picnic ground,
But one fine day he grew too bold, and tried to work with a bad head cold,
He settled down on a man named Jack, and started to laugh, but the hand went
WHACK
January 12, 2011
No cobras were hurt in the production of this post.
January 11, 2011
A band of outlaws rode to the gully marked on the map. They dismounted and tied their horses to scraggly bushes.
“This here’s the place, sure as shootin’,” said Alkali, tapping at the X on the map.
“Yep,” said Brodie, and he spat on the ground.
Butch Cavendish, the gang’s leader, strolled over and hunkered down beside the boulder matching the drawing next to the X on the map. “Does my heart good to know she weren’t lyin’ and will rest in Paradise ‘stead of sufferin’ damnation. Now, boys, start diggin’.”
Inside of an hour they had unearthed so vast a treasure as to make Aladdin green with envy.
“They’s too much too carry. I’ll guard it. You fellers go back and get a wagon,” said Cavendish.
“Why don’t you go back and get a wagon, and I’ll guard it,” said Stokes, the most cantankerous member of the gang.
An argument ensued, not one outlaw trusting another out of his sight. All of which goes to show that a good find is hard to man.
January 10, 2011
The loon was happy to entertain one of his oldest and dearest friends, Betty Boop, when she was in town to sign copies of her newest book, ‘An Unabridged History of Peru’.
January 9, 2011
the silly young handmaidens spring to the fore
their hands awash in blood and gore
in triumph they dance upon the lawn
stomping on peacocks from dusk until dawn
oh the empty-hearted deed
with great misfortune did succeed
Burma Shave
