hawk
sparrow
………….flowerbed…………………–swimming pool–……sunbather………..
…………………..worm……………..I~~~~~~~~~~~~~I…………………………..
….worm’s assistant……………………………………………………………………..
..worm’s mother-in-law…………….worm’s chef………………………………..
polydactyl – having several to many and especially abnormally many digits
“I say, old chap, might I have another peek?”
“If you must.”
“By Jove, marvelous! You’re positively polydactyl! Tell me, does it gain for you any sort of an advantage, as it were?
“I can count to 37 using my fingers and toes.”
“Ah, 27 toes then, is it?”
“Yes, if you count the stub.”
“Ah, the stub. And of course you do count it.”
“Of course.”
“One would, naturally.”
“All right, children, when I count to three, look apprehensive. Then, mother, you take a photograph of us.”
t
r
e
e e e e .. e e e e e e e ….. e … e … e e ….. e . e .. e e e
e e e e …. lumberjacks … lunching .. sitting ………on …… stumps ……. e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e …. e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e ……… e e e e e ….. e e e e e e e e e e .. e e e e
e e e e e..e e e …… e e e e e … e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e … e e ….. e e e e e e e ….. e e e e e
e … e e e e e ….. e e e e e e e e e e .. e e e e …. e e e e e e e e e … e e e e e
The Amazing Marshmallow
The miniature marshmallow was stuck in a row of miniature marshmallows along the roofline of a gingerbread house.
“This isn’t fair. I don’t want to be a decoration. I want to melt in hot cocoa and be sipped!” she complained.
“Well, tough. You’re a decoration. Deal with it. We won second prize, didn’t we? You should be proud,” commented the miniature marshmallow’s neighbor.
“Proud? Poff! I have to sit here and turn to stone practically. Hmmphh!” pouted the dissatisfied marshmallow.
“There’s not a thing you can do about it. So why don’t you stick a sock in it,” snarled a green jellybean from his position in the doorframe.
“Oh, yeah? Watch me,” retorted the by now really most quite violently angry marshmallow.
She tore herself from the roofline, rolled the slope, dropped to the floor, expanded, sprouted arms and legs, was magically clothed in a fine silk suit, stalked from the premises and was later the first female marshmallow ever to be elected President of the United States of America.
Moral: Never underestimate a determined marshmallow.
“Humans think they’re so great with their opposable thumbs and all. I’d like to see ’em flick like this,” said the forked tongue, flicking.
“Couldn’t do it. Not a chance,” commented the cloven hoof, nodding. “They’re not so great. They’re pathetic. That’s what they are. Pathetic. Did I tell you about the first one I ever met?”
“No. Go ahead,” said the forked tongue while signaling the barkeep to refill both glasses.
“It was right after they evolved. There was lots of talk going around. I heard the talk, but I’d never seen one, a human, I mean,” began the cloven hoof. “Well, anyway, here I am one day going along minding my own business like I always do. I always mind my own business, don’t I?”
“That you do. You surely do,” said the forked tongue.
“Damn straight,” asserted the cloven hoof. “So here I am, minding my own business like I said, when one of ’em comes right up over the hill in front of me. Well, that stopped me in my track, I can tell you. Now I’m a friendly sort, wouldn’t you say? Polite and all?”
“That you are. Friendly. Polite. No cloven hoof is friendlier or politer than you.”
“Damn straight. So here’s the lowdown. I say in my lighthearted manner, I say, ‘You must be one of those newfangled humans I’ve heard so much about.’ Just like that I said it.”
“Anybody says that’s not lighthearted and friendly, I’ll cut ’em,” said the forked tongue.
“And you know what the human said?” asked the cloven hoof, leaning in close.
“No. What’d it say?”
“It said, ‘Yeah, what about it?’ Like that, with a sneer. ‘Yeah, what about it?’ Can you believe it?”
“Bastard!”
The pair slammed their glasses on the bar, demanded refills, and continued their conversation.
#
1. scandalous drone
2. happy sadsack
3. troubled optimist
4. (removed by silly committee)
5. glassy gnome (not removed, but questioned)
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Doc's Lunacy
5 of 5 stars to The Great Train Robbery by Michael Crichton goodreads.com/review/show/55…
