NOVEL TITLES BEFORE EDITING OCCURRED

May 25, 2016
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War And Peace And A Lazy Summer Afternoon The Sound And The Fury And A Nice Cup Of Tea The Naked And The Dead And A Loaf Of Bread Gone With The Wind, Returned With The Rain

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LITERARY NEAR MISSES

March 22, 2016
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A Tree Grows in Brookline A Farewell to Legs Great Expectorations Huckleberry Finnegan’s Wake

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THE CLAIRE TREVOR KWIZ

December 3, 2015
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During the filming of Stagecoach, Claire managed to: a. design and build a merry-go-round. b. sneak up unobserved behind John Ford every day and shout, “Boo!” c. win a substantial amount of cash playing poker with Donald Meek, John Carradine, and Andy Devine. d. steal and later return the stagecoach four times.

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FIRST SENTENCES NOT TO BE FOLLOWED BY A SECOND

November 2, 2015
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Prudhomme Jerico unfastened the hinges of his platypus costume and shucked himself free of the disguise. The land in front of Rose Talisman rose up to greet her with a violent caress, breaking her harmonica. Stebbins Boulder vowed silently to discover why his bath attendant was an elephant. Walking in triumph, Jones wondered how he […]

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THE MARRIAGE PROPOSAL

September 6, 2015

On cue, the streetlamps exploded, and the tiny reindeer emerged from the fake buffalo and fanned out to take their positions. The slim young man wearing boots with turnover tops nodded, and the secondary display unfurled, bats chittering down the wall of the stable and the insane monkey turning flips up and down the alley. […]

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BOOK REVIEW EXCERPT SAMPLES

March 24, 2015
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This work is what I would call ‘a good book’, not the Bible per se, but a book that never in fact arms itself and robs a convenience store. This book is exactly like a braided lamp sputtering an effusion of liquid sparkles which make an ordinary parlor seem like a dentist’s nightmare. This book […]

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THE SEVENTH SEAL KWIZ

March 12, 2015

During the filming of The Seventh Seal, Gunnar Bjornstrand and Max Von Sydow relaxed between scenes by: a. sharing knock knock jokes. b. downing flagon on flagon of ale and giggling. c. waging a Bibi Andersson impersonation contest judged by Bibi herself. d. thumb wrestling. e. doing all of the above.

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THE JANET GAYNOR ‘SUNRISE’ KWIZ

March 5, 2015
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While working on Sunrise, F. W. Murnau’s brilliant and strange expressionist silent movie about a sweet little farm wife and her deeply disturbed husband, Janet Gaynor relaxed by: a. swimming in Lake Arrowhead with Murnau’s pet albino hippopotamus. b. knitting sweaters for owls. c. undergoing experimental self-induced comas. d. marching in circles leading her geese.

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THE ROBOT DOCTOR KWIZ

January 15, 2015
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In this photo, the robot doctor has just informed the patient: a. that the first thing to do was rip that stupid mustache off his face. b. that dinner was about to be served, and he was it. c. that the invasive thoracic surgery would be done without anesthesia. d. that a teeming mass of […]

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THE BIGGEST HAT

November 28, 2014
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When the names of all the movie cowboys were written on little strips of paper and placed in a hat (oddly enough, a fedora), the first name drawn from the hat by a seven year old movie mogul’s daughter with her eyes closed was Tim McCoy, thereby securing for McCoy the right to wear in […]

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