February 14, 2012

The Perfect Gift

Jim Darling was positively frantic and negatively charged over the looming impossibility of finding the perfect gift for his beloved. He pulled out his pocket watch and wound it so tightly that it exploded, sending shards of glass and metal into his forehead. Of course! Why didn’t I think of that before? Thanks, exploding watch. A song on his lips, Jim Darling hurried from the office and sped on a line directly to the nearest steed barn, where he forthwith made a purchase.

On returning home, joy trickled down his forehead, mixing with the blood, when he noted the ecstasy displayed by his beloved on first catching sight of his gift. She threw the watch fob in his face and rushed to embrace and devour the great pink Clydesdale. Snip snap, not a hoof was left. Her bloody grin was all the reward he needed. He had indeed found the perfect gift.

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