April 29, 2014

Every morning the eccentric billionaire descends the grand stairway and announces his name to the assembled staff. On each occasion the name announced is different. On this morning he says, ‘My name is Beak Hickenlooper.’

At this, the staff bows or curtsies, according to gender. The housekeeper then slips away to the dining room, where she finds the billionaire’s wife dissecting a flaky croissant.

‘Well, Harper, who am I today?’ says the lady, fork with morsel poised at lips.

‘Mrs. Beak Hickenlooper, if you please,’ says Harper.

‘Got it. Tell the fat oaf I’m ready for him,’ says Mrs. Hickenlooper, setting her morseled fork on the plate for the moment.

Harper leaves and informs the master that the mistress awaits him in the dining room. Hickenlooper strides importantly down the hall and throws wide the sliding doors.

“Beak darling! You look marvelous. Have a croissant,’ says Mrs. Hickenlooper.

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