FILTERS
July 31, 2018
Brain judgment filters are not fully installed until one is 23 or thereabouts. In some, installation is never completed.
By this guy (grown old):
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out into the palm of your right hand. Smear it across your forehead. Dance around, waving your arms. Don’t be shy. You are now invisible. To fly, simply double the recipe.
2 pinches of dirt. In the poke of dirt plant the 3 seeds. Pour the contents of the bowl over the poke and seeds. Go off into a corner and wait. When the hand of time has strangled a week or more, pluck the strange orange leaf which by now is waving from the poke. Chew it. Spit it
to step on them later with your bare feet. Your feet are bare, aren’t they? Good. That is important. You may now dispose of the steel flagon in any manner you choose, for its role in the recipe has been completed. You now add to the blue bowl with its clarinet bits and water the
1 poke of dirt Start by placing the clarinet on the ground. Jump up and down on it until you are tired. Then bash it to pieces with the steel flagon and place the largest bits in the blue bowl. Sweep the smaller bits away, as you will have no need for them, and you wouldn’t want
MAGIC POTION #FairyTaleTuesday To make this versatile potion, good for invisibility or flight, you need the following: 1 clarinet 1 steel flagon 3 seeds of any kind (doubt works well) a blue bowl filled 1/2 with water from a roaring cataract and 1/2 with empty 2 pinches and
clean the cauldron after all.’ The witch mother nodded once. ‘I thought you might.’
legs. One touch and you freeze, only to slowly melt until nothing is left but your still seeing eyes, which the Bad Skoon then gobbles up with a terrible gnashing of its daggery teeth.’ The witch’s daughter considered this new information. ‘Well, mother, I have decided to
thing. And if there is, what is it? And I don’t care because I’ve got my powers ready.’ The witch mother snorted impressively from her long bumpy green nose. ‘Your pitiful powers will be no match for the Bad Skoon. It has a great round lump of a body and 8 long poison fern leaf
THE BAD SKOON #fairytaletuesday ‘Behave or I’ll send you where the ferns grow, and you’ll be eaten by the Bad Skoon.’ The witch’s daughter narrowed her eyes and presented to her mother a skeptical expression on her as of yet still smooth green face. ‘Oh, there’s no such pic.twitter.com/TZ1uNsL9BU
4 of 5 stars to Undaunted Courage by Stephen E. Ambrose goodreads.com/review/show/41…
BOULDER, BOLDER, BOWLED HER #limerick There once was a very fine boulder. No one in the meadow was bolder. He gathered flowers for several hours. His true love? Over he bowled her. pic.twitter.com/7D9oxVfFYW
3 SISTERS #nonsense Three sisters went to the moon. Their names were April, May, and June. They found no air or curtains there. ‘We won’t be returning soon,’ said April and May and especially June.
WHERE THEY WAIT #fairytales this is the wood where witches wait impatiently for wandering fools to decorate the walls of caves with spatter for captive ghouls pic.twitter.com/4pXC2z6IWi
PURPLE REIGN #floral pic.twitter.com/rHyn3GdhOU
BEYOND #FairyTaleTuesday She disappeared into whiteness above the billowing waves Far from home she flew to dwell in the comforting echo of caves With blended thoughts, dark and light woven, she sat, content to wait Oh, what revenge she would deliver. Oh, what horrible fate! pic.twitter.com/5MlQ9LX9OQ
“Salmon and smoke. Will that be all?” “That’s what she said,” replied Harrison Mult, attorney-at-law, eyebrow shaving, blonde at bar waving. A citizen’s arrest was made by a strange armadillo in a green trench coat. No newspapers survived, and silliness was kept at a minimum.
chain, focus located. “I was born ready,” said Harrison Mult, attorney-at-law, foot floor tapping, knuckle table rapping. “What’ll it be then?” “How fresh is the salmon?” “I had to slap its face. It made a comment. Fresh enough.” “I’ll have that and a glass of smoke.”
HARRISON MULT #nonsense Harrison Mult, attorney-at-law, posing as if being considered for a seat on the Supreme Court, studied the menu. “Hello, my name is Legion. I’ll be your meal escort today. Are you ready to order, sir?” she said, pen at the ready, hair bunned, glasses on
5 of 5 stars to One Hundred Apocalypses and Other Apo... by Lucy Corin goodreads.com/review/show/41…
lumberjack fired the pistol. The insurance adjuster took an early lead, but was overtaken and trampled to jelly by the elephant. The people waiting around with bread and peanut butter were beneath contempt.
eyes of rage at the broken sky. Insufferable insults had been exchanged days earlier at the box convention, and now the result, a 100 yard race of hate, was about to play out to its inevitable forensic conclusion. Ravens gathered in the dirigible overhead just as the renegade
THE ELEPHANT AND THE TAX CONSULTANT #nonsense The elephant and the tax consultant crouched low, preparing to hurl themselves down the track. The starter, a renegade lumberjack, raised her pistol. Neither elephant nor insurance adjuster spoke a word, but both peered through slit
observant,” said the barrier. “State your desire.” “Return to me my husband fully as merry as always he was,” said Gerda, the wife. No sooner said than done. The barrier disappeared. The good husband stood baffled, but merry. The pair returned home and lived merrily ever after.
searched the woods for days. At last, she gazed at the enchanted lavender barrier. More cautious than her good husband, she paused and thought. “If, strange and beautiful barrier, you are enchanted as I so believe, you will grant me one wish,” said the peddler’s wife. “You are
THE ENCHANTED BARRIER #fairytale When the old peddler encountered an enchanted barrier of lavender blooms deep in the forest, he proceeded cautiously, but not cautiously enough. No trace of him remained. The peddler’s wife, alarmed when her good husband failed to return home, pic.twitter.com/FjfMNvjAyF
Great Chambered Mountain of Ken. Ken was quite perturbed, and rightly so.
molten ravine and were consumed by the Thunder Bull Lizard of Gauze. The Lizard scuttled merrily across river and dale and roy and trigger, finding and consuming the Cube of Happy Flavors and the Tree of Pensive Contemplation before going to live forever in the
THE LIZARD OF GAUZE #nonsense Once a cruel carpenter and his savage beast set out to find and steal the Cube of Flavors from the Tree of Pensive Contemplation, which, according to legend, grew somewhere east of the Great Chambered Mountain of Ken. Unfortunately, they fell into a
MARGARITA CANSINO #ritahayworth In response to Margarita’s question about the fairest of them all, the mirror says, ‘You’re good to go now, but wait ’til later.’ pic.twitter.com/pSYfUuSnEB
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