THE POST FOR TODAY

April 21, 2011

Wally

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TODAY’S POST

April 20, 2011

Wiley

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THE NEW MISS PAGEANT

April 19, 2011

Following the disqualification of Rose Trelawny for stealing the president’s watch fob, the first runner up has been elevated to wear the crown of Miss Pageant. Meet Iris Breedlove, our new Miss Pageant. Iris is a licensed plumber from Bennington, Vermont. When not plumbing, she can be found whittling facsimiles of Civil War cannons to […]

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CARTOON FRIDAY 98

April 15, 2011

THE PRANKSTER CLOUD

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MARY PICKFORD KWIZ ANSWER

April 14, 2011

Canada’s Gladys Smith, later known as America’s Sweetheart, Mary Pickford, in fact did every single one of those things and more. Why, she swam the English Channel to celebrate her third birthday. She balanced on one foot on the back of a buffalo and rode it in that manner from Pasadena to Santa Monica. She […]

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PAGEANT WINNER

April 7, 2011

Miss Pageant of 2011 is Rose Trelawny. Rose hails from Ames, Iowa and is a junior at the Arthur Glordobb School of Industrial Nomenclature. Her favorite color is bruise, and her favorite philosopher is Plato. For hobbies, she enjoys kayaking on dry land and knitting perfume from leftover whales. Her heart’s desire is world peace […]

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THE SWIMMING POOL

April 6, 2011

The wheels of the universe turned toward the singular wink in time when the swimming pool in Sylvia Proll’s backyard would be a portal into the 16th dimension. Sylvia jackknifed and entered the water at the critical wink. She certainly was surprised to find herself supervising bingo in one corner of a trade union hall […]

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NEWS STORY

April 4, 2011

SOMETHING HAPPENS OFFICIALS ALARMED MUCH LESS IMPORTANT DETAIL THE IGNORED WARNINGS CLAMS SAFELY EVACUATED THE MAYOR IS STUPID SHORTAGE OF ACORNS EXPECTED MICE SCURRY POLITICIANS BLOVIATE

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A SENTENCE BY JUDGE JULIUS HOFFMAN

April 2, 2011

4 years to Bobby Seale for contempt of court

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WHAT IS THIS?

March 29, 2011

A corner of Socrates’ garden? A Pompeii courtyard the day before the you know what? A cropped close-up of the winning entry in a cake decorating contest? A ghostly image of deadly robot hands? An attractive and innocent looking strangle vine near a pillar? Hint: The loon ran in terror, shrieking, “No, robot! Nooooo!”

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