THEATRICAL OFFERING

June 20, 2009

The Rodeo Clown and the Sausage Maker: A Play in 3 Acts and 2 Intermissions In Act 1, after the curtain rises, the rodeo clown enters stage left and crawls into the barrel situated center stage. Otherwise, the stage is empty. Flute music of the haunting Celtic variety begins to play. A trained bull is […]

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GERTIE

June 18, 2009

One Way to Define Gertrude Stein She did what she was doing while she did it. What she was doing was done when she did it. While she was doing it, it was not done.

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KWIK KWIZ

June 15, 2009

WHICH ITEM DOES NOT BELONG? 1 a. nitrogen-fixing bacteria b. nitrogen-destroying bacteria c. nitrogen d. bacteria e. a pleasant afternoon on the Nile 2. a. The Grim Reaper b. The Jaunty Reaper c. The McCormick Reaper d. jingle bells

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GOING UNDERCOVER

June 14, 2009

1 SECRET AGENT 2 (SECRET AGENT) 3 (. . . . . .  . . . . .) 4

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BASEBALL STORY

June 13, 2009
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HIT BY PITCH Throw it at me.  Go ahead, throw it at me, you god damn pizzaface.  I’m ready.  Come on.  Come on.  Bring it.  THUNK! Shitassdamn.  Hell.  Okay.  Okay.  I put the bat down.  See?  I put it down gently.  Lay it on the ground like a little sleepy baby.  See my smile?  I’m […]

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1949 RADIO DRAMA EXCERPT

June 10, 2009

Announcer: Heaven. Wouldn’t you like to be there? Just remember this – Girl trio: White Swan cigarettes will make you rave They’ll open up your path to an early grave Announcer: White Swan. White Swan cigarettes. Now available in radium-resistant cartons. When last we left our adventure starring Miss Gloria Swanson as plucky polar explorer […]

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FINNEGANS SIGN

June 9, 2009
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NO TREES PASSING PIRATE POPERY

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A MUSING

June 8, 2009

How many hypnotherapists are burly? And of the burly hypnotherapists, how many are women? And of the burly hypnotherapist women, how many are world class athletes? In short, is there a burly world class female athlete who is a practicing hypnotherapist? And if this person exists, does she do her own laundry? Or in fact […]

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