June 30, 2011
In the land of broken emeralds the barber stands alone. To duel with an invisible sword is to invite a friend to dine. The only thing worse than killing a horse is finding a marble. Next to soda crackers the most comforting things in the whole wide world are successful lawsuits.
June 29, 2011
How can one refuse little faces like that when they look up at you and demand freshly butchered meat? Seymour, you’ve got a point.
June 28, 2011
A friendly drunk shows up dead, and the party’s just beginning. The mean streets of Pasadena spew venom on private eye Prel Turpin as he unravels a classy dame and pays for it with a ceremonial bludgeoning. Could this turn out to be the toughest test yet for the shy shamus with minimal bladder control? [...]
June 27, 2011
Curtain up Scene Interior of a bedroom. The walls teem with a variety of crustaceans. The floor is a havoc of carpenter’s tools, hods, calculus notebooks, tubes of sun screen, limes, etc. The single piece of furniture in the room is an army cot heaped high with sandwiches. A lone light bulb hangs from the [...]
June 26, 2011
The loon has decided to tattoo almost his entire body with this design. He will leave his nose and left ear unmarked. When asked why, he replied, “Sometimes it snows. Sometimes it doesn’t.”
June 25, 2011
In America the young are always ready to give those who are older than themselves the full benefits of their inexperience.
June 24, 2011
“That’s the same loser I led through the swamp all day yesterday with my condor shriek.”
June 23, 2011
Yes, our boy Jim accidentally invented the polka when he was inadvertently goosed by the scullery maid with a broomstick.
June 22, 2011
James K. Polk was our best president because: a. he invented the polka. b. his mother said so. c. he was an early advocate of gremlin power. d. deer loved him. He was deerly beloved. e. he made an ardent, though unsuccessful, attempt to ban the harmonica.
June 21, 2011
Chapter One Hurrying to foil the plans of the villain, Mabel leaps from the trestle to avoid the onrushing train. Chapter Two Mabel lands on the back of a friendly pterodactyl and is flown to safety. Later, she runs pell mell down the hill pursued by a herd of rhinos. Chapter Three Mabel falls through [...]