April 10, 2012
The Violent Quality Control Inspector lost it completely when faced with one too many uneven seams. He spun in place shrieking, tattered the offending garment with his teeth, jumped out the window, flailed his limbs while writhing in mud, skipped laughing and wild-eyed along the canal, collapsed weeping in a puddle, and was struck by […]
April 9, 2012
Were the loon to calculate the number of hours contained in the 25 years he spent flinging baseballs plateward from behind one of these things, his right arm would spontaneously combust. As it is, it walks with a limp.
April 8, 2012
If you think that chain will hold, think again.
April 7, 2012
Bloody scraps of cloth and flesh had been left on bushes around the crater – a strange and dreadful sight that put me in mind of the butcher-bird that spikes its prey on thorn bushes. From Storm of Steel, the World War One memoir of a German soldier, reality trumping fiction.
April 6, 2012
When the drunken bricklayer finished building this wall, his clever wife convinced the client to pay up anyway by spinning out the old artistic vision philosophy statement of world despair and hope ploy. In fact, she scored double the job estimate fee. Clever indeed, and an excellent skater to boot, I might add, and, obviously, […]
April 4, 2012
Leading its demons in fertility leaps, The Bread of Life danced across the fields. Subsiding at the road, it waved the demons to rest. “That oughta take care of things for a while,” said The Bread of Life. “Can we go home now, then?” asked a particularly vile little demon, the one with green phlegm […]
April 3, 2012
This is a briny close up look at a tiny area in the upper left corner of the loon’s favorite painting. What painting is it? Why is it the loon’s favorite? It’s Ed Manet’s Bar at the Folies-Bergere. It’s the loon’s favorite because of the disembodied trapeze artist’s legs hanging down. The pink pantaloons. The […]
April 1, 2012
Janet Gaynor struggles to keep her head up under the 50 pound weight of her solid lead hat.
