Here is one of many examples why I love Walter Catlett, well known vaudeville practitioner of rapid fire patter. In the 1932 movie, Big City Blues, when Walter hands a drink to a showgirl at a party, he says to her, ‘Saturate your bridgework.’
Loon: We welcome today for the3 Question Interview one Ulysses S Grant, a former general and president of the United States. Sir, does the S in your name stand for Sebastian?
Grant’s ghost: No.
Loon: Sean?
Grant’s ghost: No.
Loon: Septimus?
Grant’s ghost: No.
Loon: Thank you for joining me today for the 3 Question Interview. Come back next week when we’ll probe the depths of yet another celebrity ghost.
(Loon departs. Grant’s ghost scowls, chomps on ghostly cigar.)
The blue petal of flame shuddered when he drew forward and softly chugged the cigar to life.
‘Thanks, doll,’ he said.
‘My pleasure,’ she replied, snapping the lighter shut, snuffing the blue petal of flame.
They eyed each other warily.
Outside, blue petals of flame descended in vengeful billions from the night sky.
Fredric and the girls are watching Louis B Mayer in his business suit launching himself from the diving board.
This candid shot was taken at:
a. Fredric’s wedding to Florence Eldridge.
b. a Louis B Mayer pool party.
c. a Modoc County political rally.
d. a benefit for The Little Sisters of Wealthy Industrialists.
first the tomato
second the insurrection
third the platter with its leaf of lettuce
fourth the aftermath
fifth death wearing its
starched apron
happy
pensive
sad
determined
enraged
baffled
satisfied or dead
Leader (wearing hat): I am not wearing this hat I am wearing!
Followers: No hat! No hat! No hat!
The next day
Leader (hatless): I am wearing this wonderful hat today. Isn’t it great?
Followers: Yes! Yes! Yes!
The next day
World ends
Loon: For today’s 3 Question Interview, the Lords of the 4th Dimension have supplied us with a movie actress from long ago, Louise Brooks. Tell us, Ms. Brooks, what was 1925 like?
Brooks’ ghost: Pretty much the same as 1926.
Loon: And if I may be so bold, what was a typical breakfast for you back then?
Brooks’ ghost: Lunch.
Loon: And finally, is the afterlife all you’d hoped for?
Brooks’ ghost: It’s okay except for the surfeit of tinsel.
Loon: That’s all for today. Join me again next week when another celebrity ghost will undergo the 3 Question Interview.
(Loon exits room. Brooks’ ghost shimmies.)
His eyes burned yellowly. – from The Maltese Falcon
RSS: Subscribe to
Doc's Lunacy
5 of 5 stars to The Great Train Robbery by Michael Crichton goodreads.com/review/show/55…
