I wish that I could see the people’s faces as they look in amazement at me, a man made of inner tubes, a dark tornado that can save them from drowning.
A perfectly clear statement needing no explanation from me.
Fair warning – She’s a soul snatcher.
The Thanksgiving Christmas Tree Girl:
a. is a creative way to punish a child.
b. is seen floating over Denmark every year in late November.
c. presides over the blessing of the cauldrons.
d. is contemplating sweet, sweet revenge.
e. captures the souls of all who gaze into her eyes.
Thanks for:
1. not smoking.
2. the old slipping on a banana peel joke.
3. flowers that bloom in the spring, tra la.
4. microwavable darts.
5. imaginary clowns with beaks.
6. sock knitting reindeer.
7. that guy down the street who doesn’t bother anybody.
8. sirens, mythic and fire engine.
9. the old walrus card trick.
10. trembling in my glory.
All people in the world should remain secluded in individual huts and emerge rarely, and then only to sing. – Loon Whose Railroad Tracks Don’t Come Anywhere Near Reaching The End Of The Line
Loon: Today we have some kind of raggedy fellow with a beard for our 3 question interview. The Lords of the 4th dimension forgot to tell me about today’s ghostly guest. So I’ll just have to wing it blind, so to speak. Tell me, celebrity, would the average, oh I don’t know, let’s just say, apple grower know your identity?
Johnny Appleseed’s ghost: Yes sirree. Sure as shootin’. By cracky, you got that right, young feller.
Loon: Aha. Then, moving logically, let me just ask you point blank whether or not the phrase ‘kitten on the keys’ means anything to you?
Johnny Appleseed’s ghost: Well now, sir, I don’t reckon as to how that means nary a thing to this here old codger.
Loon: Then I’m right! You are the ghost of Vincent Van Gogh, are you not?
Johnny Appleseed’s ghost: (Alarmed, eyes darting left, then right, strokes beard, fades away)
Loon (with pride): Join me next week when I’ll probe the mind of another famous ghost.
No other factory in the world mixes chocolate by waterfall!
From you-know-who and the you-know-what
The Grim Reaper:
a. has an excellent dentist.
b. refuses to play chess with Swedes.
c. is not such a bad guy once you get to know him.
d. gave a commendable performance in a Perth revival of Phantom of the Opera.
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Doc's Lunacy
5 of 5 stars to The Great Train Robbery by Michael Crichton goodreads.com/review/show/55…
