Whenever I visit Penelope on the bank of the stream where she lives ‘neath a tree I bring an assortment of her favorite treats like mud sludge and pond scum and rotten black beets. For this I’m rewarded with one of her smiles and one of her bloodstained tooth sharpening files. Don’t believe for a […]
Oh, my word, what cutthroat bowling matches they had, girls against the boys.
When Blossom Seeley and Benny Fields were vaudeville headliners, they spent whatever spare time they had: a. in the lab fruitlessly trying to develop a ray gun. b. reading Kafka to their chihuahua, Roderick. c. bowling with their pals, George Burns and Gracie Allen. d. speaking easy, if you know what I mean.
1. Atomic sandwich bags 2. Do-it-yourself lobotomy kits 3. Braided worm bracelets
Loon: Today for the 3 question interview we have the highest unprecedented honor to present to you for the second time, ladies and gentlemen, the ghost of a movie star of unbound certitude, Mister Harpo Marx. Welcome again, Harpo. Harpo’s ghost: (honks horn, grins maniacally) Loon: First question. Could you really play the violin, or […]
Tommy did make the mistake of challenging Pat to a 3 mile run.
Besides for president, Pat Paulsen once ran: a. a hippopotamus into the ground. b. from Moline, Illinois to Wichita, Kansas wearing a lemon-scented orange beret. c. the Bald Eagle Hawk, a small newspaper in Weed, California. d. Tommy Smothers into the ground. e. a zoo in Poland.
The marmalade man went door to door in his dark clothing. He carried his fired clay pot of marmalade hanging from his neck by a chain. A silver ladle he clutched in his left hand. At each door he rapped twice sharply. When he did so, a thin panel slid open and out was thrust […]
RED RAGE SEETHING CHAINSAW TEETHING LO, THE TINY TRIFFIDS SWARM BEST NOT LINGER TO LOSE A FINGER IN THE ENSUING FRENZIED STORM
Nothing exciting. She slipped, fell, and sprained her wrist. Favored it for a while, but didn’t miss a single day’s work.
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Doc's Lunacy
5 of 5 stars to The Great Train Robbery by Michael Crichton goodreads.com/review/show/55…
