April 13, 2014
Loon: Today for the 3 question interview we have a distinguished looking bearded gentleman, a Mister Charles Darwin, I am informed. Tell me, Mr. Darwin, are those boots comfortable?
Darwin’s ghost: To be forthright, they are slightly snug.
Loon: Following up on that, have you ever spilled honey onto your beard?
Darwin’s ghost: You are remarkable, sir. Honey in my beard is quite the next thing to a daily occurrence.
Loon: And finally, are lemons your favorite fruit?
Darwin’s ghost: No.
Loon: Thank you. Come back next week when we’ll probe the depths of yet another famous ghost.
(Loon strolls off. Darwin evolves through wall.)
April 11, 2014
What can I say? He had a strict cook. No dessert if you don’t finish your vegetables.
April 10, 2014
JP glowers because:
a. he can’t have dessert because he didn’t eat his broccoli.
b. the minion he’s staring at brought the wrong gold plated mustache comb.
c. he’s just been told wealth is not all giggles and pranks.
d. no matter how much his heart yearns for it, he can’t unilaterally ban the accordion.
April 8, 2014
Preparing to go Fishing with Pop Henley or
How I Broke Bread with the Devil in Hell or
Giving One’s All for Art
April 6, 2014
Loon: I am joined this morning for the 3 question interview by the ghost of J.P. Morgan, a prominent financier, whatever that may be. Mr. Morgan, why are you wearing spats?
Morgan’s ghost: I want your coat. Give it to me.
Loon: I’m not wearing a coat. What coat do you mean?
Morgan’s ghost: In the closet there behind you. Quickly now.
Loon (retrieves coat from closet, hands same to ghost): Why do you want my coat?
Morgan’s ghost: None of your business. It’s my coat now. Mwawhaahahaha. (disappears)
Loon: Join me next time when the Lords of the 4th Dimension provide yet another celebrity ghost for the 3 question interview.
April 5, 2014
Darwin Plaguemaster, the board certified lemming, approached the edge of the cliff with some trepidation and a bag of walnuts. He tossed one walnut over and watched its descent onto the crusty spikes far below. A faint nutty cry of pain drifted up to chastise the lemming. With a firm nod, Plaguemaster retreated to safety and lived a relatively happy and long life reading palms. That would be palms as in trees, not as in hands.
April 4, 2014
They are discussing wealth, the healing balm.
April 3, 2014
These British bankers are discussing:
a. the situation in India.
b. the size of King Edward’s hernia.
c. the source of the Nile.
d. the eccentricities of their hostess.
e. wealth as the balm that heals all indignities.
